Hugs and prayers from Texas

I am in utter shock and awe and can't stop thinking about the children in those classrooms, their families, their teachers, and their community.  As a teacher and a mother, I take my day by day routine for granted - taking Jack to school each day believing he is completely safe for those 9 hours.  These parents got up and took their children to school, kissing and hugging them, and probably relishing in the fact that it was Friday and they had the weekend to look forward to, as I always do.  Christmas is a week and a half away and it's a purely magical time for children.  They are almost out for school...probably taking spelling tests and making Christmas crafts to give their parents.  And one person walks in and changes all of their fates forever.  He stole their lives and those that were left to live - he stole their innocence.  These children, these teachers, these families - they will NEVER be the same.  I can't stop thinking about it or saying prayers for them every moment that it enters my mind again.  I think Jared thinks I'm crazy but this really gets to me.

We go through a lockdown drill at school every couple of months - practice, get an announcement that we did well, and go back about our business.  But this really hit home for me.  What would I really do if this happened at my school?  I went to a psychic during our last girl's weekend right before our wedding and she told me something bad was going to happen at my school and someone was going to lose their life and I would be there.  She said we would be in a large group setting when it happened or when we found out.  It about scared the bejeezus out of me and I remember being almost sick going to work that Monday morning and for the next couple of weeks thereafter.  Nothing has come of it and I thank God daily that it hasn't.  But today I just can't help but think that this could be anyone of us.  And how would I react?

Jack's school has a code system when you enter and exit and just this week, the computer crashed so the door has been open and there has only been a sign in/out sheet.  Now I'm totally freaked out about taking him to school.  My heart is heavy and I'm sending out lots of prayers for the children, their families, and their communities.  I can't even imagine what they are feeling. And I'm completely petrified about the world our children will grow up in.  How did it come to this?